My Mom's Not Going to Like This

You see, my mother's a died-in-the-wool feminist, achieving more in her mumble-mumble years of living the belief that there is nothing a man can do that a women can't (when she did hit the glass ceiling, it was because of religion, not gender) than most people can imagine. So you'd think that the odds of my being a chauvenist would be pretty slim, right?

And you're right, mostly. The thing is, I recognize the fact that - in general - there are some things an average male is better at than an average female. The big example is physical strength. Your average male is stronger than your average female. But along those same lines, your average female has better balance and a higher tolerance for pain (yes, it's true) than your average male. One isn't better than the other, they just have different strengths.

So, why does this matter in fencing? The physical differences don't, really. The psychological differences do. At least to me they do. Okay, before you jump up on your soapbox and start haranguing me for being a sexist pig, let me explain. You see, women don't, in general, find going out and blowing stuff up a relaxing way to spend an afternoon. For them, agression is something that has to be cultivated, whereas it comes so naturally to men that, if anything, it has to be reigned in. And when you consider that half of fencing is proper use of agression, you can see where this becomes an issue.

In my experience, you can bring out the agressiveness in even the most timid male fencer by two simple steps. The first one is to go at him hard and heavy for about five minute (not quite club him like a seal, but along those lines). This gets him to understand instinctually that you're not really going to hurt him. The second step is to have him do the same to you. If you do it right after step 1, he'll be frustrated enough that he will come at you hard and heavy. This will not only make him understand that he's not going to hurt you, but it'll also flip a switch in his cave-man brain, and he'll know that it's okay to attack. Yes, sometimes it'll take a few tries, but if it takes over a half-hour to get him to attack instead of just defend, I'd be surprised.

This doesn't work with women. At least not in my experience. And neither does having them picture their brother/sister/mom/whatever, at least not anywhere close to consistently. The truth is, I have no idea how to bring out the agressiveness in women fencers. Let me tell you, I had fun trying to explain that to the mother of one of our local fencers. She was asking if I could help her daughter become a more agressive fencer and I told her no. When she asked why not, I tried to explain how women and men think differently. Needless to say, she didn't take to that too well. But when I asked her if she understood how men thought, she admitted that no, she didn't. I told her that the easiest way for her daughter to learn how to be agressive would be for her to talk to someone who wasn't suffering from testosterone poisoning (i.e. another woman).

I'm sure there are people who don't agree with me, who do see this as and admission of sexism, but I like to think they are wrong. Rather, this is an admission of a personal limitation. Just as I can't take apart an opponent's style by watching them fence, I do not know enough about women to bring out the agressiveness necessary for fencing. The mechanics of fencing, I can teach to anyone, but the mindset is beyond my capabilities.